No rain, hot weather coming our way... I am dreaming of vacation.
For the fifth time today we queued, as my twelve-year-old son said in his best British impersonation. His British slipped into Swedish, but I chuckled nonetheless. At least this queue was out of the burning sunshine.
The air-conditioned holding tank piped in almost current music and even a slide show distraction while we pretended our 3-D glasses were Ray-ban© designer and we were movie stars rather than weary tourists waiting to act as a “shrunken audience.” I hated “True Colors” (it was a morning radio staple that targeted my age group, so it reminded me of Starbucks® coffee and TJ Maxx® deals and Aerostars®), but combined with the poignant (not corny I rationalized) Kodak® images of vibrant families simulating touching milestone moments, I couldn’t help but hum along and wipe the spec that suddenly irritated my eyes (my son said I could get the red out with Visine®) as I gazed upon my own family milling about. With zero chores and clean sheets and ‘top-notch’ accommodations—not to mention loads of family time—it had turned out to be a terrific week. So what if the brochure-promised "family-time" was spent in "queues?"
I chose to think of it as quality time, since we got to really listen to, and laugh with the boys (or at least I found the patience to clench my teeth and smile indulgently rather than scream it's only funny the first time as my son attempted the tired ersatz British accent again). Later we could spend more time together as we waited our turn for Pluto or Captain Hook or Chip and Dale to visit our table while we ate overpriced burgers and paid for the souvenir photograph. We would go to the parade and light the night with the Simba flashlight and Pocahontas glow sticks. Of course, we would order the keepsake dvd of the spectacular(!), and hurry to catch the shuttle so we could spend the last half hour of our day at the Lego® store and maybe get a Ghirardelli® chocolate shake for dessert, and, and....
That’s when I realized; we paid to vacation inside a commercial.