Thursday, April 8, 2010

THANK YOU

Thank you to all who stopped by Eldritch Way and read "Memories Captured".  I decided to submit this to Shock Totem, so I have to remove this story from my site.  Thank you for all the great comments and encouragement.

27 comments:

Olivia Tejeda said...

That is one frightening and fast moving story. Rich detail and what felt like real-life horror ... the worst kind! Loved it. ~ Olivia

G.P. Ching said...

This one definitely had a twilight zone quality to it. Chilling. Nicely told.

Cathy Olliffe said...

And when you get an idea, you really get an idea. Holy moly! What an insanely original concept... and what a creepy old broad.
Good stuff, so many lines to love.

Al Bruno III said...

Very good and very weird...

Jen Brubacher said...

This had me so hooked! Great pace, great description. At first I thought she was a zombie but your idea was so much better. And then photographing her to get her back in the frame, and deleting it, was brilliant. This is my favourite so far.

Michael Solender said...

peggy you do odd so well..great pacing and payoff

Laurita said...

Wow, this was great. Nice pacing. You had this set up from the very first sentence. Really great story.

Laura Eno said...

Awesome, fast-moving story! I would have stomped that phone to death too. :)

Valerie said...

That is a whole world of creepy. Makes you think again about the old superstition of pictures capturing a person's soul.

mazzz in Leeds said...

awesome concept! loved the buildup too, wonderfully paced

John Wiswell said...

The paragraph with the photos on the wall and the monstrous cake was downright surreal. I also really liked the descriptor choice there - that the cake was "monstrous." And I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds roses cloying.

Final paragraph has another really slick use of description, stomping it until its unrecognizable.

Aaron Polson said...

Lovely. Weird makes me happy, and this was plenty weird. I'll be checking out more of your work. ;)

Timothy P. Remp said...

Wow my friend, what a trip. Very visual, fast paced and original. The creepy old woman really grossed me out. I like the description of all the animated picture frames.

Dorian Gray would certainly smirk ;)

-Tim

ThomG said...

This is incredible, Peggy. Really gripping, fast-moving and a great ending. And what a wonderful idea. I enjoyed this so very much.

One very small quibble, and it's the journalist in me. I hate exclamation points. I know it's a transition, but maybe:

"Something hard jabbed into Toni's hip. Her mobile. The edge of an idea slid across her brain."

But, damn, girl, I'd kill to have had this idea.

Melissa said...

WOW. So original, so well-told. I was completely hooked first sentence to last.

Marisa Birns said...

This got the heart pumping!

Great idea you got there.

Dee Martin said...

this was awesome - I tweeted it.

Karen from Mentor said...

So believable because it was so well told.
Awesomely paced. Very vivid imagery.
Well done!
Karen :0)

Donald Conrad said...

Wow, that's a boat-load of bizzare horror for a flash. Niiice. Thanks.

Iapetus999 said...

I knew something was up with my phone.
Creepy!

lilymulholland.com said...

Modern technology does have its uses after all. Being a mother of two kids, I can totally relate to the sudden and dire need to get to the loo too!

Sam said...

This has got to best one of the best horror flashes I've ever read. Bravo! What a cool concept.

Eric J. Krause said...

Very cool! As someone above said, I was expecting a zombie story, but this was much better. Quite a neat idea, and you executed it brilliantly.

Heather Lloyd said...

Really imaginative and gripping story. Your characters are well written and draw the reader in from the start.

Tony Noland said...

Creepy! I loved the way the modern technology worked seamlessly with the magic in the house.

Bukowski's Basement said...

Hi Peg... I'm late to the game here but ... better late than never, right?. And wow! What a creepfest you conjured. That week off did you good, huh? Kudos...

函佩政松 said...
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