Wednesday, December 16, 2009

THIS WEEK'S THREE WORD FLASH

Okay, okay! I promise I'll get up and do my shopping, even though I stayed up way past midnight to finish writing this one. Before you read, I'll have you know I do not have any daughters. Or daughter-in-laws... yet.

MILF

Barbie tried the door knob. Locked. "Amber? Please, I never meant—"

'HOW COULD YOU MOTHER!" Barbie flinched. Amber shrieked vibrato, giving her words a contrasting harmony as if her daughter was possessed instead of just hurt and hating.

"He was my BOYFRIEND! DO YOU HEAR ME? [hiccup] MY FU-HU-HUH-KING BOYFRIEND!"

Barbie heard a thump and shattered glass. She wondered if it was the mother and daughter sterling-framed photo or the Amber and TJ photo inside the red-heart frame. Another thump-CRASH. The other one.

"Please baby."

"fuh-[hiccup], FUCK YOU!"

"I know you're hurt. Let me tell you, you can't trust males—look at your father! He left me, six months pregnant, no job, no home, no—"

"Shut up shut up SHUT UP! This isn't about you and your sorry fucking past! THIS… is… a... bout... ME! AND HOW YOU RUE-[hiccup] RUINED MY LIFE!"

"AMBER! HE mauled ME!" Barbie rattled the door knob. "UNLOCK THIS DOOR!" Barbie inhaled, then slowly released her exhale. "Let's talk."

"I HATE YOU GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!"

Barbie slammed both palms against the door. Two more years of hormones and tantrums. A teary, loud, (guilt-ridden) two years. Barbie sagged. She didn't think Amber would stay until her eighteenth birthday. She wasn't sure if she'd stay until next week.

Barbie stepped into the bathroom, splashed water on her face. She stared into the medicine cabinet mirror. If she squinted hard, almost shut her eyelids, she could see a little bit of Amber's youthful features on her own face; between the 'laugh lines' (wrinkles), underneath the 'sun-kissed' (leathery) skin, framed by her lustrous golden (wiry brass) hair with the dark (gray) roots. She wondered if she'd get to see Amber age.

No, Barbie hadn't meant to hurt her daughter, she just wanted to pretend she wasn't fast approaching "middle age." She wanted to feel attractive again, even desired. She wanted the ardor of a young, virile male at his peak instead of the prescription hard-on of an aging, pawing, paunchy widower. Was that wrong? Was it wrong to want to be called a MILF?

Temptation knocked, and she opened the door. It was TJ asking for Amber.

Barbie invited him in, said he could wait here and how 'bout a cold one? His eyes widened, a smile teased his lips and he said, sure, why not. She knew. Hell, everyone knew an eighteen year old wouldn't say no to beer.

So what if she unbuttoned one blouse button, bent into the refrigerator, let him check out her shapely ass? Two hours a day at the gym, her ass better look good, to any age male. Maybe she did touch (caress) his shoulder, rub (massage) his back, asked him (whispered) would he like something… else? And when he said, er, no ma'am, maybe, just maybe, she asked him if he was gay. Teased him, unbuttoned another button, called him queer boy. Leaned in closer to him, watched his lips separate, heard him pant.

He grabbed her blouse, popping off the rest of the buttons and yanked at her bra and mauled and poked and demonstrated he was a testosterone-influenced eighteen-year-old boy with two beers in him and a raging need to prove he was one-hundred-percent-genuine-heterosexual. And just as she panicked and wondered how stupid could she be, what was she doing… Amber came home.

Barbie knew she'd done wrong and could not make it right. Middle age taught her one bleak truth: MILF meant 'Mother Is Lonely Forever."

20 comments:

Tim Remp said...

I always look forward to your short stories and this one keeps me wanting more of your work.

I loved the twist at the end. When I first saw your title, I wondered how you were going to flip this one around and WOW did you. I felt for the characters which is what we, as writers, shot for.

Well done my friend, well done.

ThomG said...

Iwasn't sure at first that I liked the words in parathesis, but then it really struck me that it was such a good use of construction. I, too, liked the twist at the end.

Chadwick said...

Oh what a predicament.
Great style and delivery.
Not gonna lie, I like Barbie's voice.

gautami tripathy said...

I love twisted ends!

Daily Panic said...

I like dialogue stories, this was powerful and so real. thanks for stopping by my blog.

Amy J Taylor said...

Probably the only thing I didn't have a teen tantrum at my mother about! Thank God! I was really amused by this...you write a 16-year-old attitude really well!

shannon said...

Wow, nice job creating a character that made me want to slap her and hug her at the same time...in such a short space! Still cringing at her bad decision. yikes.

David Masters said...

I loved loved loved all the subtexts (bracketed truths) in this.

The line: "a raging need to prove he was one-hundred-percent-genuine-heterosexual" made me laugh, as well as the whole paragraph around it.

Poor Barbie and Amber. Great choice of names.

Laurita said...

I believe I met this woman...

Great flip around at the end, and I loved the hiccupping dialogue.

PS the Pratsie said...

*bows to the mistress of storytelling* !!

PS : m no longer on twitter ut m so gald to met u there .. till next time, keep reading my blog :)

Eric J. Krause said...

Great dialog. You did a great job in showing her regret, too. Excellent story.

Tumblewords: said...

Good characterization. This event has a ring of truth to it.

quin browne said...

oh, peggy.

this is... you are... it was... oh, peggy.


i am shaking my head in my usual envy of your work. you are just effing amazing.

Laura Eno said...

Great lesson about stopping to think before regretting a decision forever. As a mother, I can't imagine even going there but I've known some who have.

Linda said...

Wow. Glad this is not borne of personal experience.

Great story, the dialogue (as quin says) 'effing amazing'.

And the prescription hard-on? Priceless.

Peace, Linda

theothersideofdeanna.wordpress.com said...

Fantastic work! You chose the perfect names, and really conveyed that teenage angst with aplomb. Super job!

mazzz_in_Leeds said...

Heh, like Amy, thisis the only argument I never had with my mother!
Loved the [hiccup]s and the bits in parentheses :)

Weezel said...

Dialog moves this story along so fast it was over before I was ready. Really remarkable job at story telling!

ganymeder said...

Poor kid! I see the mother's pov but have no sympathy for her. I thought you walked the line well.

Larry said...

Damn that was a great story. I don't know how I missed this one peggy but I'm glad I stumbled on to it tonight. Very looking forward to reading more like this one Bravo Great job...


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